The Walls Around My Heart
by AvelinAeliaLisalynn
Summary: Felix is the owner of a large company hiding away in his mansion mourning the death of his wife. When it becomes apparent that he is falling into a depression, the servants decide that drastic measures need to be taken and send for Cry, Felix's childhood friend, the only one able to get past his walls. Pewdiecry, T for swearing, AU.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi! I know, I know, I probably shouldn't start a new ongoing, but I couldn't resist the idea. For one, I don't have to deal with a universe where Marzia doesn't exist, or they break up (NO) to write PewDieCry. I also love Markimash and Krinx too, so that's gonna make an appearance as well **** Three birds, one stone; three ships, one story. Perfect!**

Ken was worried.

He had known Felix for all of his life, from the first time they played in the forest together to the time he was named master gardener. He didn't even feel like a servant, just a friend who did a lot of work out in the garden and got a very generous amount of money as gifts. He was there when Felix met Marzia, he was there when they married, he was there when she died, and Ken had never, ever, ever seen Felix like this.

He had seen how deep his love for her had gone, and ever since that fateful day Felix had slowly been falling into a depression, relying on wine and whiskey, and neglecting his company. Things had gone too far.

"We are here today for an important reason. All of you know Felix as more then just servants, and you've seen what Marzia's death did to him." Slowly Ken looked around the small table. Minx and her wife Krism, the maids, sat to his left. They wore twin expressions of worry and care. Mark and Aaron, the chefs, sat to his right. Besides Ken, Mark had known Felix for the longest; the others had joined his service after. Across from him was a solitary empty chair.

Ken continued on. "We all loved Marzia, but Felix needs to move on, for the sake of himself and the company." Ken took a deep breath. "I believe that drastic measures need to be taken. I think… I think it's time to fill the empty chair."

The reactions were immediate. "You know why he left, Ken," said Mark, frowning and twirling his warfstache. Krism looked confused for a moment, until her wife whispered in her ear. Then her eyes went wide and she clamped a hand over her mouth. Other then that, Minx was silent, an unreadable look on her face. Aaron looked at the empty chair.

"I may not have known him personally, but from what I heard that might be too drastic," he said in his British accent.

In the end, it was Minx who sided with him. "I think he's right, guys. Have you seen him? He's gonna go off the fucking deep end- unless we get Cry." She stood, the purple streak in her brown hair falling over one eye. "I vote we send for him."

Krism nodded. "I'm agreeing with Minx. I've only ever heard rumors and whispers on the wind, but this Cry may have the keys to saving Felix."

Mark sighed, and stopped twirling his warfstache. "I'm skeptical, but this might work."

Aaron mimicked him, sighing as well. "I'll go with it, but we can't have Felix knowing. If he did, he'd, well, let's put it this way- he wouldn't be happy." Everyone around the table nodded.

Ken released a breath he didn't know he was holding in. "So it's agreed. We'll send for Cry and explain the situation to him and ask him to try to get through to Felix."

At that moment, the door opened. All heads turned towards the open frame, or more specifically, the masked man in it. Shock and surprise was written on every face, even Minx's. Ever so slowly the man walked over to the empty seat. A loud scraping sound like nails on a chalkboard was heard as he dragged the wooden chair back before sitting down. It was then that he finally spoke. "There's no need. I'm already here."

**A/N: Plot twist! The author is too lazy to write an extra chapter for Cry's arrival, so she had him be a ninja and sneak into the first. **

**I might not be able to nail the YouTubers personalities perfectly, especially because I've never watched a Krism video, but I'd LOVE advice and criticism on how to make this better. And Felix will be super OOC at the beginning… I'm thinking about making this 8-ish chapters long. Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

It was decided at the meeting that Cry would go to Felix and ask for his old position back as his butler. "He never hired another one after you left, there's no need to worry," they assured him.

"Just be careful, ok?" asked Ken, a hopeful yet sad smile on his face. "He's going to be angry when you confront him again."

"Then again, he's always angry now," sighed Krism.

"Don't worry," assured Cry. "I'll be _fine_." He made sure to emphasize fine, for his sake or theirs he couldn't tell.

"Your rooms are still the same," smiled Aaron in his accent. "He went all ape-shit when Minx tried to change them, so her and Krism have been cleaning them and it hasn't changed since you left."

"Seriously," said Minx, eyes wide. "He freaked out and almost threw something when I suggested we should give them to someone else. His face was like a tomato." She moved her hands around wildly as she spoke, before slowing down and brushing a purple bang from covering her eye. "Would have been hilarious if he hadn't been drunk off his ass."

"All these years?" asked Cry, surprised. More food for thought- first, the fact that Felix hadn't hired another butler, and the second, that he hadn't changed his room? Interesting.

Minx nodded. "All those years."

"Ok, it's almost 11 so I say we should all go get some sleep, because tomorrow will either be a huge disaster or a smaller huge disaster," suggested Mark. Heads around the table nodded.

As everyone left, they all gave Cry wishes of good luck or a pat on the back. "It's nice to have you back," whispered Ken as everyone went their separate ways, excited yet dreading the next morning.

* * *

When Cry awoke, it felt like he was finally home. The bluebirds were chirping, the sun shone in a little trickle from his window, and as he rolled out of bed, his body automatically walked over to his bathroom. He brushed his teeth, noting that the bathroom looked exactly the same as it had years ago, then walked over to the dresser. Did he dare believe that... Yes, all of his suits and his spare masks were there, in almost the same condition he had left them in. As Cry put on his favorite suit (a plain black one with a white tie that had swirling black designs on it) and tied his mask, he felt something stir in his stomach. Butterflies. He sighed, telling himself if was Felix's rage that made him nervous, but it was so much more.

By returning here again when Marzia sent him the letter, he was returning to his past, and his love for Felix.

Love. What a strange and alien word to him. He loved Felix, yes, but it had been his love and his scars that sent him away. His love that had him burn the wedding invitation. What good is love when it only brings sorrow? He didn't know, only that now, he might actually have a chance with Felix.

Cry pushed his feelings aside, realizing that in that time he had somehow wound up in front of Felix's door. It made him sad yet happy at the same time, that he had already fallen into a routine. He took a deep breath and pushed on the handle before his nerves could get the best of him. No turning back now.

**A/N: This was mostly just backstory, but I wanted to upload something. The next section will be the hardest for me to write (I know this because it's one of the only chapters I have left to write), so it might take a while. I love reviews, if you would take the time to write one would mean a lot :)**


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing he noticed was the wallpaper. When he left, it had been a wonderful shade of cherry, with a pattern of stars. Now it was a plain blue. In fact, the whole room was varying shades of the sky, from his bedcovers to his curtains. The place looked relatively clean for a drunkard, but that was probably Krism and Minx. The only things that looked out of place were the dents and scratches in the hardwood floor and the bottles of alcohol lying around. Felix himself sat at his desk, swiveling around to face him.

"You dare show your mask in here again." With just that first sentence Cry could tell so much had changed in the years he had been gone. Felix's face, once filled with light, happiness and a permanent smile, now looked gaunt and shadow-filled, giving the appearance of being much older then his 20-something years. A bottle of alcohol stood on his desk, next to piles of paperwork, some of it fluttering onto the floor.

"I'd like to ask for my position back as your butler," said Cry, bowing down in the doorway.

"And why is that? Do you think I need a butler?" asked Felix, raising an eyebrow. "Or are you running back home because the real world didn't suit you."

Cry ignored his scathing remark. "I returned as soon as I heard the news. I thought you might want company."

"I'm fine," snapped Felix. "Get up, though. There's work to be done, and I can't have my butler dilly dallying and bowing in my doorway all day."

Cry straightened up. _That was much easier then I thought it would be, _he thought as he closed the door and stepped into the large bedroom. It scared him, how Felix was acting so serious and cruel. But for the sake of his friend he would stay, and maybe he could make a difference.

* * *

That evening, Cry decided to confront Felix about his drinking.

"Felix," said Cry seriously, staring at him across the small table.

"Cry," said Felix mockingly in return, his fingers clutching the bottle of alcohol securely.

"Felix, your drinking needs to stop," said Cry, putting out a hand for the bottle. "Hand it over."

"It's none of your fucking business whether I drink or not, Cry," spat Felix, gripping the bottle to his chest as he sent Cry a dirty look.

"Now, Felix," said Cry firmly as he reached even farther across the table.

"You know what, Cry?" asked Felix, cold as ice. "I don't need your babysitting, or your help. I'm in charge here. You're just a servant gone out of their place." For the first time in this argument Cry showed hurt at his words, and it gave Felix a twisted sense of happiness. "If I want to drink, you are in no position to stop me," he finished, a dark smile on his face.

"Felix..." said Cry in almost a broken way. "Please. I just want to help you." As he spoke he shrunk back from Felix, completely surprised that he would play such a card. Cry didn't know who he was talking to, what thing had possesed his friend.

"Out, Cry," ordered Felix, pointing a shaking finger at the door. "Come back when you can be respectful." Cry, too hurt to fight him, obediently walked out the door. Only when it slammed shut did either party let the tears begin to fall down their faces.

Felix's victory was shallow, for as soon as Cry left he realized what he had done. "Right when I got him back," he whispered, alcohol forgotten. "What have I done."

**A/N: The next couple chapters should be up pretty quick. I'm not sure exactly where this is going, but I'm off to (what I think is) a good start. Reviews are welcome, I love getting criticism :) Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Why did you really come back?" Cry froze at the sound of Felix's voice. It had been three days since the drinking incident, and this was the first full sentence he had spoken to him since then.

"Marzia," he replied, shifting his mask automatically to hide his nervousness.

"Marzia," echoed Felix, the light of the sunset contrasting and giving him a shadowy appearance as he sat cross legged on his balcony, his back to Cry. He sounded so hollow and so dead that it took all of Cry's willpower not run over to him, shake his shoulders and tell him that he's not alone, and that someone still loved him. It broke Cry's heart to see him like this.

"She sent me a letter." Cry let Felix process the information before he continued. "She asked me to come back, to help you get through her death." He could see Felix visibly start when he stated it so bluntly. "Before you correct me," Cry said quickly, "You need to realize that by ignoring it you're not making it go away."

"Shut up," said Felix, but it was weak and pathetic. The bottle in his hand rolled away, coming to a stop at the edge of the balcony.

"Do you really want me to shut up?" asked Cry, but he already knew the answer.

"Yes," said Felix, then he sighed. "No. Continue."

And so Cry continued. "She loved you, but she wanted you to move on, and to be happy." And, he said silently to himself, she gave her blessing to us, because if I made Felix happy then she could rest in peace.

"That's it?" asked Felix.

"That's it," lied Cry. A little piece of him broke when he said that, because he was such a coward he couldn't admit the truth.

"Food's ready!" called Minx from outside the door. "And if one of you doesn't come out here to get it, I'm gonna eat it myself!"

The moment ended and Cry strode towards the door, adjusting his mask. "You know that would be against the rules, Minx," he said, sighing good-naturedly as he opened the door.

"Yeah, and so was leaving that frog under Aaron's pillow when I was cleaning but all you did then was laugh," she argued, handing him a bowl of stew that smelled like heaven itself.

"That was years ago, Minx," said Cry, smiling at the memory under his mask. "But I can understand why you'd want to eat this."

"It's Mark's specialty," said Minx, grinning. "I've been trying to bully him into giving me the recipe, since Krism is in love with it more then she is with me." Cry's only response to that was the small bit of laughter that escaped from his lips. He thanked Minx as he spun around, closing the door behind him.

"Don't bother telling me what it is, I can smell Marks stew from a mile away," said Felix, already sitting down at the table.

"A mile?" asked Cry in a joking voice as he set down the steaming bowl.

"Maybe not a mile, but you get the idea," said Felix, and Cry could have sworn there was a small smile on his lips.

Progress, thought Cry. Progress.

**A/N: Ohmygod, I'm so glad people like this! Here's a second chapter in the same day. It was the first chapter of the whole story I wrote. If you leave a review, thanks :)**


	5. Chapter 5

It had been a week since Cry had explained Marzia's letter to Felix, and while he began to smile and sometimes laugh when sober, more often then not he was drunk off his ass. The drinking incident seemed to have slipped from his mind, but not Cry's. Neverless, Cry had finally decided enough was enough, so as Felix sat down for breakfast with a bottle of who knows what in his clutches, Cry wrapped his fingers around the top of the bottle (carefully avoiding Felix's fingers) and said one word. "No."

Felix's only reaction was a sharp tug of the bottle. "No," said Cry, firmer then before, but he gently tugged the bottle in the other direction.

Felix halfheartedly tugged the bottle again, and Cry could tell that there was an inner battle happening inside him. "Look at me, Felix," he said softly.

Felix spun around in his chair. "I'm not looking at you, I'm looking at your fucking mask," he spat. The sudden turn to anger surprised Cry, and in that moment he made a decision.

The mask fluttered to the floor, revealing a myriad of scars, some small, some large, but the largest two parallel ones that went from the top of his forehead to the corner of his lip. Felix gasped, eyes wide. "Now you're looking at me," sid Cry, his voice calm, but his heart pounding.

"I never knew..." he whispered. His hand slowly unclenched the bottle as he reached up to brush over Cry's cheek, light as a feather. For the first time, Cry didn't shy away from someone touching his scars, but simply let it happen.

"This is not about me, it's about your drinking problem," said Cry, gently grabbing Felix's wrist and setting it down a good foot away from the bottle.

"It's not a-" Felix replied automatically, but he stopped mid sentence, because now that he thought about it, it was. What would Marzia think if she saw you like this? asked a small part of his brain. _Shut up_, he told it, but it was a weak reply, for the sake of pride only.

"You know it's a problem. You've been neglecting your company, hiding away and drinking yourself into oblivion. You have friends who are worried to death about you. Minx, Krism, Aaron, Mark, Ken and I all care. You aren't alone," Cry leaned down to pick up his mask with one hand, all the while keeping a grip on the bottle. When he felt Felix was deep enough in thought he let go of the bottle and re-tied his mask. Then he snatched up the bottle. "I'll be taking this, as well as all of the alcohol hidden around here, and locking it up in the cellar. And taking away your key."

Felix sighed. "It's for the better." Cry could hardly believe his ears. He had expected so much more of a fight like last time, but Felix just seemed resigned to his fate.

* * *

When Cry brought the bottle and Felix's key the meeting that night, all everyone else could do was smile.

"Willingly?" asked Ken, eyes wide. Cry nodded.

"I could barely believe it myself," he said, setting the bottle down on the table with a thunk, the keys falling with a clink just a second after. Krism stared at the two items like they were aliens before she shook her head.

"How on Earth did you do it?" she asked.

Cry froze for a fraction of a second, before smiling under his mask and replying cryptically, "I have my ways."

"Did it involve kissing?" questioned Minx innocently. Cry jumped in his chair just the tiniest bit, making a noise similar to a screech.

"No! What the heck, Minx? Thinking I would try that after his wife died?" he said, thankful for the mask that covered his pink tinged cheeks.

"Ah- but you aren't denying the fact that you like him," said Mark with a devilish grin.

"What? How- how did you- No! No, I don't like him!" spluttered Cry, his cheeks growing uncomfortably hot.

"Don't worry. Your secret is safe with us," said Aaron, patting his arm a couple times.

"No but seriously, did it involve kissing?" asked Minx again.

"How many times will I have to tell you- no, it didn't involve kissing!" said Cry, and later he would deny fiercely that his voice went up a pitch.

As it turned out, he had to tell them another three times before they believed him. Cry gave a good natured sigh- he knew this was their way of supporting him, and after so long, it was good to have friends again.

**A/N: A slightly longer chapter for y'all. This is the last of the pre-written chapters, so expect a few weeks before another comes out. Thank you so much for the support, feel free to leave a review :)**


	6. Chapter 6

"I have a wonderfully amazing plan," said Minx with a devious grin, rubbing her hands together delightedly.

"Bebe," warned Krism, "last time you said that you got me in so much fucking trouble with Felix that it wasn't even funny."

"Ah- but this time, if it works, Felix will be too busy making out with Cry to even care," shot back Minx, and Krism would be lying if she said that didn't catch her attention. "This is so delicious, this plan. And it's so delightfully simple, too."

"Ok, Minx, cut to the chase and just tell me," said Krism, a tad exasperated.

"Tomorrow, go into Cry's drawer, find the letter Marzia sent him, and put it on Felix's desk," instructed Minx.

"And that accomplishes..." Krism left the sentence hanging in the air for her wife to finish.

"Just do it, bebe, ok?" asked Minx.

After a moment of though, Krism sighed. "Fine," she grumbled, curiosity winning out.

* * *

"Fuuuuuuck," moaned Felix, holding his head. He knew the symptoms of withdrawal, but what he did not know was how shitty it would feel. He blindly reached out for the bottle he kept out on his bedside table, and moaned once again when he remembered that Cry had taken it all.

Oh, Cry. A small smile made it's way onto Felix's face. As soon as he realized it he frowned, shaking his head. Cry had guts, that was sure, to come into Felix's life and tear it to pieces after 6 years.

And fuck, he had done it again. Cry'd wormed his way into Felix's heart, with the simple way he had said "No" and gripped that bottle of alcohol, with the way he was always there to support and help. He didn't lose his patience. After that horrible first incident, he didn't leave. No, he slowly struck down each of Felix's walls until he got to the person within. And unknowingly, he'd struck down one more then he intended. He'd ripped too shreds the walls around Felix's heart, and now that he got in there was no getting out.

Now Felix was stuck like this. How could this be? Did he really care about Marzia so little that a measly month after her death he fell in love (if he dared say love) with his butler? Was he just so starved to love that he would dishonor her memory? It stung more then the withdrawal did, that was for sure.

It was then, as his eyes traveled around the room, that Felix realized there was something laying on his desk. The piles of paper had decreased in size enough for him to notice that a new envelop was there. Hm. Krism or Minx must have left it for him. That was good. It was something to focus on instead of Marzia or Cry.

Felix got out of bed, still in the casual sweatpants and t-shirt he'd been sleeping in, and picked up the letter. The stationary... He felt the ribbed edges with his fingers and examined the flowered pattern. They were familiar, they gave him a sense of happiness and safety. And then, like a slap in the face, it hit him. This was Marzia's homemade stationary envelopes.

Felix stumbled backwards, sitting down on his bed with a thump. He fell backwards, holding the letter close to his chest. They must have found one of her old letters, thought Felix. With hands that shook, he held the letter out.

The first thing he noticed was the date was only two weeks before her death. The second was that it was addressed to Cry.

Cry's words came back to him. "She sent me a letter. She asked me to come back, to help you get through her death." This has to be that letter. Cry must have left it for him to read.

Slowly he slid the it out of the envelope. The paper was slightly crinkled, and he was hit with a bout of sadness as he unfolded the handwritten letter. The script was so familiar, and for a moment Felix just stared, thought of anyone or anything gone except for the flowing blue ink stained upon the paper. He traced the cursive letters with his finger as he read the letter. It was exactly the same as Cry had said, except for one part he had left out.

"I know the real reason why you left," it read. "I know how you feel about him. And if you can make him happy I can rest in peace, so go ahead with my blessing."

For a beat Felix simply stared at the paper, caught up in the words and the ink and the simple Marzia-ness of it. Then the meaning of her words hit him, and he was running out the door, letter in hand, not even bothering to change or think before he was at Cry's door, delivering two loud knocks.

**A/N: Oooh... Cliffhanger... I can't believe I'm almost done with this story. It'll be my first true ongoing story I've ever finished. There is one more chapter, and then maybe an epilogue :) Review, favorite, all that stuff; see yah next time!**


	7. Chapter 7

The morning light trickled in from the window as Cry sat on his bed, wistfully looking out into the gardens. He sighed. So much has happened in the past 2 weeks. He'd returned to the mansion and become a butler once again. He'd gotten past Felix's walls and maybe even saved his life. And in the process he'd fallen in love with his master all over again.

He heard the sound of growing footsteps, fast on the wooden floors. Two hard knocks on his door resounded through the room.

"I'm here," said Cry, adjusting his mask as he strode to the door. He opened it to find Felix himself, face sweaty as if he had just been running, still in his pajamas while Cry wore a suit, his eyes wide. Cry had to take a moment to compose himself at the sight. Then his eyes drifted lower, to the handwritten letter in Felix's hand, and the breath left his lungs in a gush. He wasn't given time to even come up with an excuse before Felix began to talk.

"Why the fuck didn't you tell me what she really said sooner, huh?!" asked Felix, almost screaming. He threw the letter to the floor. "Here I was, moping around because I couldn't stand the thought of betraying Marzia's memory, and she was giving you her fucking blessing." His rant finished, his breathing began to slow down to a normal pace.

"Wait what?" asked Cry, confused.

Felix sighed. "You dumbass, I like you."

Cry stood there for a second, starstruck. "Me," he said finally. "You like me." He shook his head. "How... I don't even... But Marzia..."

"She said so herself, her time is fucking done and now it's yours," said Felix firmly. "So kiss me, you idiot."

Cry stared into the face of the man he had loved for so many years, brushing aside a wisp of Felix's hair. "Are you sure?" he asked, nervous.

"Yes I'm fucking sure," said Felix, exasperation clear. Then, taking matters into his own hands, he reached out and shoved Cry's mask up, revealing red tinged cheeks and perfectly kissable lips. Felix's heart was beating fast again, but for an entirely different reason than before.

Slowly, ever so slowly, he reached out to grip Cry's tie, then in one swift move pulled him in for a kiss.

When they broke for air, both were breathing hard. The heat in the room seemed to have gone up 20 degrees as they stood, staring at each other.

"I just have one question," said Cry between breaths. "Where did you find that letter?"

Felix knit his eyebrows, confused. "I thought you left it on my desk."

Cry shook his head. "Nope, not me. Hmmm..." A thoughtful look came onto his face. "Well, it wasn't you; Yami and Mark are probably too busy kissing each other to bother setting this up, Krism isn't devious enough, Ken is currently out in the garden, no one else knows about it, so it must be-"

"Less talking," ordered Felix. "I can give a fuck about who put the letter there after we're done making out."

Cry didn't stop him from leaning in, only laughed and said, "I don't think we'll ever be done making out."

And twenty years, one wedding and three kids later, Felix still agreed.

**A/N: Thank you for reading The Walls Around My Heart! I may or may not do an epilogue, depending on whether you guys want it. But until then, this fic is done. Review if you'd like, and goodbye :)**


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